Defying the Precipice

Life is a gift. It's often difficult and messy and challenging, and we have to work hard to enjoy the best of what it has to offer. In fact, sometimes we have to fight for it.

We live on the edge. There's a push and pull to our lives. All of us are potentially a breath away from a terrible accident, a debilitating illness, a horrifying loss. Oddly, we're mostly able to live our lives as if the precipice does not exist. When we see someone near us go over the edge, it's shocking. The sudden death of a contemporary rocks our foundation. The end of a marriage that seemed so solid to outsiders shakes us to the core. The mental breakdown of someone we love confounds us and breaks our hearts.

So we make permanent camp on dangerous ground. We sing, and dance, and love, and enjoy the view. We light campfires and contemplate the beauty. We sleep in peace. When one of us gets too close to danger, we try to calmly talk them back to safer ground. When another scrabbles for footing on the edge, we band together to provide steadying hands. Mostly, the village binds us together and provides security.

Every once in a while, a lost soul is drawn to the abyss against all reason, as if mesmerized by the vertigo it causes - as if something there calls to them. Inexplicably, but predictably, they eventually take a purposeful leap into the nothingness. We'll never understand why. There is nothing we can do to stop them. It's a horrible, horrible thing to witness.

I'm in the group who defies the precipice. I'll bravely party here where we live, but regularly sneak a peek over my shoulder to check my coordinates. I won't follow anyone who feels compelled to actually flirt with the abyss. I'll fight tooth and nail for the happy life I have and the well-being of the people I love. I want to stay around and thrill in the spectacular view. Take a look, but watch your footing. Be safe, and enjoy the gift of Life.

Stepping Out to Sing

Those of you who know me know something of my musical background. I started singing in Junior High School, in Mrs. Scozzafava's popular chorus. That lead to more choral experience and some musical theater fun throughout high school and college. I sang in the church choir at the Greek Orthodox Church of St George in Bethesda, Maryland. With several national chorus student groups, I had the chance to perform at Carnegie Hall and the Kennedy Center. My degree is in Music from Northwestern University, where I enjoyed performing in several productions of Gilbert & Sullivan operettas, as well as the acclaimed Waa-Mu student variety show.

After graduating from Northwestern, I started a career in the hotel business.  My involvement with the world of musical performance stalled, although for several years I sang with the Dallas Symphony Chorus and, later, with the Memphis Symphony Chorus. It's been at least seven years since I have made the time to take part in any organized outlet for my singing. Now I'm retired. I have the interest and the time and no excuses.

I love my retired life, my community, and my friends. I am protective of my time, and am hesitant to make a lot of specific commitments of my time and energy. But it is time to step out of my comfort zone and explore other activities.

A twist of fate occured one evening in downtown Prescott. While walking down Gurley Street with Ron, we happened to see friends dining in a restaurant. They waved us in. We met Hal Lobaugh, who builds homes in Talking Rock. His wife, Suzy, is the director of Prescott's chapter of Sweet Adelines*, named "Song of the Pines". Just days after expressing interest, Suzy called to recruit me.

Tuesday night, I attended a rehearsal as an observer. What I observed was a professional, organized, well-directed musical group. We did physical and vocal warm-ups, and spent several hours rehearsing music in preparation for future performances. I enjoyed the selection of classic songs performed in close harmony. I noted the emphasis on sound vocal technique and the tuning of pitch. The focus and commitment to the group as a whole was evident. I was impressed.

My voice needs some exercise, and Song of the Pines needs some additional manpower in the Lead section. I think I'm stepping out to sing again.

*Sweet Adelines is an international association of women's barbershop choral groups.

Age Advantage

Age is a number. Age is relative. At 57 years, I would be considered "old" by many young people. In this country, there is a shocking lack of respect for, or interest in, old people. (During the height of the recession, I actually had a person on LinkedIn suggest to me that I should "die off" and make my job available to someone younger!)

Age bias is based on ignorance and is usually easy to shrug off. The truth is that we have many advantages that have come from our life experience:

We are past any identity crisis we ever had.  We know who we are.
We don't care much what other people think, as long as we are doing what's right for us.
We are not impressed with status symbols. 
We are past worrying about looking silly.
We understand our physical limitations and are generally at peace with working within them.
We know the value of a good night's sleep and appreciate how well we feel upon awakening.
We have routines that give us comfort and keep our lives in balance.
We know who our friends are, and quietly avoid people that are bad for us.
We have the perspective to pick our battles.
We know when to ask for help.
We are more careful about what we eat and how it will affect how we look and feel.
We are realistic about our fading youth, but take care with our dress and beauty routines.
We have financial security and work within a budget.
We know the value of good health, and do what we need to do to preserve it.
We have a lot to share, and find pleasure in doing so.
We treasure our family and friends, and aren't shy about expressing our feelings.

This is a personal perspective. I know these things are not true for everyone in my age bracket, just as they are not NOT true for some young people. What I'm trying to say is that I don't feel "old". I am older, I am wiser, I am happier, and I am well and at peace with where I am in my life. I won't ask for anything more.

Looking Back at 2012

One of my new traditions, since retirement, has been to create a annual photo book to summarize the year. The process of putting it together allows me to meander through my collection of photos to select the best representations of places and events throughout the past months. It used to be common to lovingly put together photo albums to keep memories. Now, with digital photography, too many of our favorite photos hide in our computers where we just don't see them that often. That's a bit of a shame. Hence my photo books, which frequently get plucked off an occasional table for re-review.

Construction of the book has the welcome side effect of stimulating remembrance. I smile and chuckle as I see pictures I had forgotten, recollecting conversations and visual snippets of activity. It all is a reminder of the abundance of happiness and love in our lives today.

2012 was a crazy busy year for us.

We packed up our urban condo life to move everything to our ranch cottage in Prescott. Then we worked like dogs to clean and paint the place to prepare it for renters. Closing that chapter was challenging and very bittersweet. Eventually we will sell the place in Chicago, when market conditions so allow. For now, we are fortunate to have found a very nice couple to live there and take care of it.

The happy highlight of our year was our trip to England with friends. There are so many special memories from our tour around southern England that I had to make a photo book for just that trip, a copy of which I gifted to our dear friends and travel companions for Christmas.

Summer in Prescott in our Talking Rock community was a giddy whirlwind of golf, parties, club events, and more golf. It was fun and exhilirating and, somehow, relaxing at the same time. It was a period of recovery from the stress of moving, and truly established us as full time residents in Arizona.

October took us to New Hampshire for my mother's open heart surgery. We were so thankful that Mom made it through the main event with flying colors. Two and a half months later she continues to struggle some through her recovery, and we are concerned about several after effects. But we are amazed by Mom's courage and grit, and thankful for the care provided by my sister Althea and the visiting nurses. Our hopes are high for continued improvement.

As this year winds down and I sift through my photos and memories - I am grateful for so much. We have wonderful, generous friends, a beautiful place to live, many things to keep us busy, and the health to allow us to keep on truckin'. We love our family and hope to see more of them in the new year.

Happy New Year to All! Let's make it a good one.

What I See

This should be a season of comfort and joy, yet last week it was shattered by the violent and tragic events in Newtown, Connecticut. I admit that I haven't watched much of the news on this, because it's grossly and inappropriately sensationalized by the media. Besides, it makes me deeply sad - for the families of those killed, the family of the shooter, for their community, our country, and for the state of our world today.

Perhaps some positive change will come out of what happened. We're thinking about it, dreaming about it, and questioning how something like this could happen. We're praying for the innocent souls of the children and adults who lost their lives. We have discussions and engage in arm-waving about gun control and mental illness. I hear people railing in anger. I suppose "something" will be done, and changes will be made in policy and laws. Will it make a difference? I hope so, but I don't know. Our need for change is deeper.

I believe there is Evil in our world. This is the dark side of Faith. I believe that given an opportunity, Evil can become resident in human souls. We can successfully fight it, but first we have to recognize it. It can be kept at bay by each of us by applying love, patience, grace, humility, and care to our thoughts, our words, our relationships with others, and in everything we do. It's not always easy - but we can try. We can make things better.

This Christmas, when I look at our Christmas tree, I see many things. In the lights, I see the Star of Bethlehem, and the stars over our own home. In the gifts, I see the wonder of the Three Wise Men, and the love my family and friends have for each other. In the ornaments, I see new angels on high and an appreciation of the blessings we have in our lives. I see hope. I see love.

Merry Christmas / Καλά Χριστούγεννα

Any Excuse

When I chatted with my mother yesterday, part of our conversation was about our busy social calendar for the next few days. While describing the plan for that night - Ladies Poker Night in celebration of a friend's birthday - Mom aptly commented, "Any excuse for a party!" Obviously, our friend's birthday was well worth celebrating, but it's true that we residents of Talking Rock don't need much of a reason to get together and have fun.

Parties can be planned or break out spontaneously at the drop of a hat. Ladies Poker Night was a well-planned event, made easier by the willingness of attendees to pitch in. We all brought food and drink (too much of course), but our hostess and her friends added fun with a few creative touches. We were invited to dress the part of poker-players, and were provided with (candy) cigarettes and sunglasses. I'd share some cute pictures of the girls, but we agreed "What happens on Jay Morrish Drive stays on Jay Morrish Drive" and I need to respect that.

Tonight Talking Rock Club hosts their annual Holiday Dinner and Gift Exchange. Chef Richard will create a wonderful meal, then we will gather around the Christmas tree and fireplace and open gifts that can then be "apprehended" by others who wish to trade theirs for someone else's. I'm looking forward to the fun, laughter, and holiday spirit among good friends.

Friday night is the ever-popular weekly Happy Hour at the club. We'll start gathering at 4:30 for cocktails (it's great to be retired); a happy habit that normally progresses to dinner. Tomorrow, we'll be part of a table for 10 that will help us celebrate Ron's birthday. Friday is a weekly excuse to get a just a little gussied up and just ENJOY the company of others in the warm, comfortable environment provided by Talking Rock.

We are very fortunate to live among people with similar interests and attitudes. Our friends are generous with their hospitality, time, and hearts. There is no place we would rather be, and we are loving spending our first Christmas season here in Prescott.

Building New Traditions

Several friends have recently asked me whether we miss being in Chicago during the Christmas season. The answer comes quickly - yes, we do. We loved navigating snowy sidewalks while shopping for gifts, and meeting up in a restaurant or tavern for a bite to eat and a hot toddy. Each year we would attend either the Chicago Symphony's "Welcome Yule" concert, or the Goodman Theatre's production of "A Christmas Carol". The season wasn't complete without buying a new glass ornament from the Christkindlmarket (the German Christmas market that pops up every year in the Loop.) Our tree was placed in the front room to provide a festive view to neighbors walking down Bittersweet Place. During our four years of city living, we created new traditions that helped us greet the season in comfort and joy.

This is our first Christmas season in Prescott. How could we not embrace new traditions in the city recently officially proclaimed as "Arizona's Christmas City"? Prescott takes this designation seriously by hosting a number of festive events open to the public.

We have attended the Christmas Light Parade, where local businesses and organizations create lighted floats that make the rounds downtown. The very next week, you can attend a Christmas Parade in the daytime, where Santa make his official appearance. That night, the Courthouse Square Lighting takes place. This creates a fabulous tableau, including lighting on the Courthouse itself, as well as on many huge trees, and the town Christmas Tree. Tomorrow night, we will attend Acker Night for the first time. Acker Night is a showcase of more than 100 musicians, who perform in numerous downtown venues, including parks, galleries, restaurants, bars, and street corners. Tips proffered are donated to music education programs for local children. I love that idea.

Our own traditions are being modified this year. In addition to some of the city's events, we will attend a Christmas Dinner and Gift Exchange with our friends at Talking Rock. There are also several private parties to which we have been invited. We'll host a few close friends in our home for champagne and hors d'oeuvres on Christmas Eve.

The Christmas tree is up and lighted, and our Christmas shopping is winding down. Soon we can slow our pace, and just enjoy the new traditions we're building.

Happy Holidays!