Over But Not Out

Today is the 5^th anniversary of my Runaway Boomer weekly blog. With this, I’ve published 262 posts on a rambling array of subjects. This has been a wonderful way to express myself; allowing me to explore what’s in my head and share thoughts and feelings with friends. Feedback has been rewarding and heartwarming.

My weekly self-imposed deadline was established to contribute some structure and discipline to my personal schedule after retirement. Given that our post-career life has evolved into a full, busy mixture of routine and spontaneous fun, I no longer feel the need for this weekly ritual – in fact, I am beginning to feel a bit stifled by it. My creative juices flow on their own schedule…not necessarily over morning coffee on Thursdays.

Runaway Boomer will continue – but postings will be less frequent and predictable. You will hear from me when something is on my mind that causes bubble and flow. I will write when, if I didn’t, my head might explode.

I hope you have enjoyed my blog over the past 5 years. Most certainly, I have! I’m not sure what’s next… I’ve always wanted to write a book, but I’m not convinced that I have the required attention span. Maybe Twitter is more my style. I’m open to where circumstances take me.

Peace

Retirement Brain

I forgot this was Thursday - Runaway Boomer blog day - until 5 minutes ago.

This is one of the risks/blessings of retirement. We don't always know what day it is without a calendar. I have two calendars, yet I still have occasional issues. My phone is my primary resource. Secondarily, we have a lovely Arizona Highways desk calendar that we keep either on the coffee table or the kitchen island.

Yet here it is, Thursday, and I forgot to write my blog this morning.

Days of the week are difficult enough, but the date is another thing entirely. I rarely write checks anymore, so don't have that reminder. Thank goodness for my cell phone, without which I would be lost. (Literally lost sometimes, as I use it as a GPS too.)

There are schedule touchstones, weekly events that usually keep us tuned in:

SUN: Couples Golf & $2 tacos at the club
MON: Golf with Ron
TUE: Sweet Adelines rehearsal night, and a new episode of "Justified" to watch when I get home
WED: Errands in town
THU: Afternoon golf with the girls
FRI: Happy Hour at Talking Rock's club
SAT: Ron's weekly hike, and when I put fresh sheets on the bed

The great thing is that we mostly don't care what day it is. We don't have to get up early. We don't have to go to work. After so many years of doing what we had to do, we now do what we want - pretty much when we want to. Woo hoo! Retirement brain isn't so bad.

Grown-Up Friends

It's interesting and rewarding to gain new friends when you are an older adult. There's an inherent difference between this experience and when I made friends as a child or teenager. I'm still trying to put my finger on exactly what it is...

As a child, you expected to have friends, and stumbled upon little buddies as a normal part of life. We would take our rubber ball out into the street to play kickball, a bunch of other little kids appeared, and you made friends. It just happened. You were drawn to certain other students at school, and all of a sudden you had "peeps" on the playground. I sang in chorus and made friends with others chorus nerds. It was easy. My college friends continue to hold treasured places in my hearts, because that's where we really grew up, together.

As young professionals, making new friends became a little more complicated. Yes, work yielded some new acquaintances and friends, because we spent so much time there. We had to start being more cognizant of romantic relationships among our peers - trying not to make anyone jealous, or sending out the wrong signals. We became more transient, relocating because of our careers, leaving friends behind (geographically), and building a new life. Once committed to a spouse, our world revolved around each other more than friends.

So many distractions are out of play now. It's simply a lovely surprise to make friends when you are middle-aged. It is, perhaps, the greatest unexpected joy we have discovered early in our retired life. In our 50's, we are not as competitive in our friendships. We don't worry about hanging out with the popular kids. My girlfriends laugh if we show up in the same golf outfit. It doesn't matter if we conform with anyone else's idea of how we should look, or who we should be. It's pretty cool that people like us for who we are. At this point, we're unlikely to change much.

The passage of time and the goodness of life colors our enjoyment of each other in a soft light. Occasionally we are faced with reminders of how fragile life can be. The laughter, smiles, hugs, play, jokes, and closeness follow us from day to day, comfortable knowing that we are part of something warm, and bigger than we are alone.

Thank you, Friends.

Five Years of Retirement Fun

Five years ago this week, we walked out of our Hilton offices to start our retirement. Within days, we moved from Memphis to Chicago and began to savor our new lives. Since then, everything has changed - for the better. We are endlessly grateful for how much joy has entered our lives. From Memphis to Chicago to Prescott, from hiking to golf, from Italy to Greece to England... What a wild ride so far! Thank you to everyone sharing this wonderful journey with us. It wouldn't be half as much fun without you.

Busy, Busy, Busy!

I'm swiftly approaching five years of retirement, in May. It still amuses me that some people thought I would be bored in this stage of my life. "What will you DO?", people would gasp when I told them I was leaving the corporate world behind. My work life pace was dizzying, exhausting, and stressful. Looking back, I honestly don't know how I coped from day to day. What I know now is that I didn't eat properly, exercise enough, spend time with friends, or take very good care of my home. On top of that, I often didn't sleep well. The financial rewards were great and I am grateful that allowed me to run away sooner. But I was slowly killing myself.

Truly, I feel almost as busy today as I was when I worked. The difference is that my time is my own, and I choose what to do, with whom, and on what schedule. I don't lie awake at night, worrying about playing golf tomorrow and having dinner with friends. OK, that almost made me "LOL".

I am so NOT bored. My calendar for March was packed with activity almost every day. Granted, things are perking up around here a little with the advent of warmer weather. But here's some of what I did this month:

Dinner at friends' homes (5 times), Nine & Dine at club, Golf (several times a week), Sweet Adelines  chorus rehearsal (once a week for 3 hours), meeting with contractor (for patio expansion), medical check-up, Nine & Wine, overnight trip to Scottsdale, Cubs Spring Training game, dinner out with friends, Friday Night Happy Hours at club, Wine Pairing Dinner, Silpada jewelry party, St Patrick's Day golf tournament, haircut, party planning, Spring cleaning (indoors and out), patio furniture delivery, lunch with an old Hilton friend, Bunco Night with the girls, a Talking Rock Communication Council meeting, a Wine Tasting, several long phone calls with Mom and far-away friends, and blogging. That doesn't include normal housekeeping, laundry, shopping, and preparation of meals. And we still have four days left in the month for more golf, including a tournament on Friday, and an Easter Brunch party for 64 invitees that we are co-hosting with our neighbors.

Busy, busy, busy - and loving every minute of being a Runaway Boomer!

Politics Threaten Well-Planned Personal Security

You've all heard about the "Fiscal Cliff" and the related political scramble toward the end of 2012. If nothing is done, January 1 will usher in many financially-onerous effects on the public. Some changes will affect businesses, but do not be mistaken about the very real impact on you and me.

Temporary payroll tax cuts will expire, causing worker's paychecks to be reduced by 2%. Shifts in alternative minimum tax will affect millions of taxpayers. The tax cuts from 2001-2003 will be rescinded. Many government programs (including Defense, Medicare, and Education) will be in line for deep cuts. If these changes occur, the reaction will likely spark another recession.

Possible alternatives that are being bandied about are very concerning. There has been a lot of talk about higher taxes for "the rich", or closing tax loopholes. But who decides who are "the rich"?

The really frightening stuff I'm hearing discussed are possibilities such as:

1. Taxation of existing wealth (as opposed to income). Never mind that we already paid taxes on what we have, which came from work income. This is double-taxation.
2. Elimination (or reduction) of homeowner mortgage deductions. How many more people will lose their homes if they don't have this deduction?
3. Social Security ineligibility for individuals with more than a certain amount of net worth. This is not an entitlement. This is our money that we earned that the government promised would be paid back to as retirement income. We counted on that.
4. Dividend income for investors could become taxable, further discouraging investments and economic growth. Given that companies already pay tax on their profits, this would be another form of double-taxation.

There is a very real possibility that our elected government officials will be threatening the long term plans of millions of citizens who have worked hard to earn what they have.

If you aren't following the news on this, I strongly suggest you stay tuned in. I'm fearful that some of our country's basic principles are being threatened. These are the types of threats that spark actions generated by fear and uncertainty. Companies will stop hiring and eliminate positions - again, and unemployment will rise at the same time unemployment benefits will have to be cut. People will take their money out of investments to hoard cash and precious metals. What other adverse reactions will there be when people feel their well-being and way of life is under attack?

The Power of Friendships

In spite of all the careful planning we did for our after work lives, I never really considered one of the most important requirements for happiness…the potential for new friendships.  Ron and I are each other’s best friends, but there are other people that are important in our lives.  Many of them are far-flung geographically, and we don’t get to see them much.  We interact via telephone and internet, and see them when we can.

There are studies that show that friendships rank right up there with good health and finances as the factors most likely to boost happiness among retirees.  Friends become an extension of the support system that often is anchored by family.

When we bought our home in this community in Prescott, little did we know what a big part of our happiness would be provided by the wonderful friendships we have made.  Our friends “come out to play” with us on the golf course, hiking trail, and during events at Talking Rock Club.  They provide sympathetic ears, laughs, entertainment, and ideas for new activities.  These generous people have opened their homes and invited us in for dinners, parties, informal gatherings, and holidays.  We, in turn, have opened our home to them.  This is all what makes our neighborhood a true community, and what fosters the development of meaningful relationships.

Fortunately, we blindly stumbled into the best living situation we can imagine.  Our friends have introduced unexpected companionship, caring, fun and love into the fabric of our lives in colorful heaps.  They have banned the possibility of boredom and added a new richness.  We gladly share this phase of our lives with them all.

Please don’t overlook the important goal of enhancing your social life in a meaningful way after retirement.  It needs to be a consideration in your planning.  I hope you will be as lucky as we have.

XOXO 

Time to Smell the Roses

Many years of work, planning, and saving have led us to be in a place where we can settle and enjoy life to its fullest.  It’s taking a little time to realize that we have arrived at a long-term destination.  For so long, we focused intently on the next steps - leaving our corporate jobs, moving to Chicago, and then finding a home the Southwest.  Oddly, now that we have achieved our goals, it’s a little disorienting.

You know that feeling you get after a long road trip, when even after you get to your destination and get out of the car, it seems as though you are still moving?  I feel a bit like that right now. 

The current plan is to live in our community in Prescott for as long as we are able.  We love the area and our home and friends, and have plenty to see and do.  Other than enjoying all that, we don’t really know what’s next.  That’s mildly disconcerting for someone like me, who is a planner.

Eventually we’ll need to have discussions about how to prepare for a point in life where we need assistance.  As we and the huge population of Boomer compatriots age, there will likely be more and more options for appealing situations for our sunset years.  I know we have to figure that out; but not right now.

Right now, we will smell the roses, nurture our health, take care of each other, laugh with friends, breathe deeply of the high desert air, explore our interests, connect with others, and stay active.  We’ll know when it’s time to start planning again.

Sum-Sum-Summertime

The official start of summer is next week, but here at Talking Rock Ranch, we are already fully engaged in seasonal fun.

When I tell people I live in Arizona, they immediately think of Phoenix and the hot, hot, hot summer weather.  But in Prescott, we are 100 miles northwest of the Valley of the Sun, at almost a mile-high elevation.  Our temps are usually about 15 degrees lower than those in Phoenix.  For example, today’s forecast for Phoenix is for a high of 104 degrees.  Our local forecast is for 86 degrees. Evenings cool dramatically, dropping into the 50’s.  This weather is very conducive to spending time outdoors.

Summer sandals, shorts, golf shirts, and sundresses are de rigueur at Talking Rock.  Common dress could be described as “resort casual”; (a bit of a change for us, coming from Chicago).  At our weekly Happy Hour gathering Friday afternoons, many of the ladies up the ante a little by fussing more than normal with hair and makeup, and adding a little fun jewelry.  Our guys may trade in their polos for colorful Hawaiian shirts.



Fun at last year's Luau at the pool.

The atmosphere during summer is festive.  It feels a little like those treasured vacations from school when we were kids, when we pursued fun all day long, and well into the evenings.  Many Talking Rock residents are retired, and we know how to enjoy ourselves.  Club management, in cooperation with involved members, our hospitable neighbors, and the city of Prescott provides numerous opportunities to stay active and enjoy each other’s company.

This summer, we will be enjoying several golf tournaments, wine tastings and dinners, BBQ’s, VIP seating at the Prescott Rodeo, spontaneous gatherings on back patios, arts and music festivals, neighborhood parties, birthday celebrations, hikes, al fresco dining on the club’s Granite Mountain patio, tending plants in the community garden, taking a dip in the pool, practicing on the driving range, cooling off with an ice cream bar at Coops, or a little bit of pampering on a Spa Day at the club. 

Whew, the social calendar is getting full!  We’re loving every minute of it.  Retirement=Boredom?  Don’t be silly.

Without a Net

In my transition from Illinois to Arizona, I have lost my health insurance.  The insurance I had in Illinois after my COBRA expired was a high risk pool sponsored by the state.  Having been declined for individual health insurance, I was eligible to apply for this safety net provided to full-time residents of Illinois.  My coverage was through Blue Cross Blue Shield, and we paid about $560 a month for it.  For Ron’s individual policy, we paid another $325 per month.  Each of us had a $2500 annual deductable.  Do a little math and you can guess that health care has been a substantial percentage of our expenses in retirement. 

Thirty-five states have high risk pools – Arizona is not one of those.  Now full-time residents of Arizona, I just sent in the cancellation notice for my Illinois insurance.  I applied for individual coverage in Arizona, and have been declined.  So now what?

The Obama administration’s Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, AKA “Obamacare”, will be my safety net.  Although a very imperfect bill (yes, I read the whole dang thing), it will provide the option I need to secure health insurance in this long gap I am in before being eligible for Medicare.  Obamacare requires states without high risk pools to provide them to people who prove that they cannot otherwise obtain health insurance.

But…in order to be eligible for Arizona’s high risk pool, I have to be uninsured for six months.  This is a condition of entry into the plan that, frankly, I do not understand.  I prepared as well as I could for this period, by seeing my doctor and having a check-up, making sure my prescriptions are current, and having a colonoscopy.  All I need to do now is make it through six months without a major incident.  I am very scared that my situation has put me and Ron at great financial risk.

I’m writing about this for several reasons.  (1) If you have group health insurance through an employer – appreciate it.  You cannot be denied coverage, and most employers pay fifty percent or more of your actual health care costs.  (2) Your health is precious.  Any health issues become part of your history and until Obamacare is fully implemented in 2014, could result in you not being able to obtain insurance.  Finally, (3) You must consider and plan for your health insurance needs in retirement.  There are many resources available online that will clarify the situation and explain your options.

If the federal health care law is ruled as unconstitutional by the Supreme Court, I may be without my safety net for much longer than six months.  It doesn’t seem right that I can’t obtain health insurance, even though I can afford to pay for it.  Health care reform outside of Obamacare probably wouldn’t come soon enough for me.

Wish me good health!

A Chapter Finished

Today I turn a page in the story of my life. 

It rarely feels this deliberate; finishing one chapter

And beginning a fresh one. 

This is one of those times.

Chicago is now where I’m from,

Not where I live.

Looking forward to a new life in Arizona,

Saving good memories of these years.

Thanks for everything, Lady by the Lake.

All the joy and the beauty;

You gave us such a great beginning.

We’ll always love you.

Our World is a Little Dimmer Today

This may not be the best day for me to write a blog celebrating retirement.  Yesterday my dear friend Tom Wingham passed away unexpectedly.  He was only in his forties.  When Tom missed two conference calls for work, his co-workers became concerned and contacted a friend to check on him.  She found him at home, dead in a chair, with his work laptop in front of him.

Tom Wingham was an extraordinary person.  He successfully blurred the line between work and his personal life and pleasures.  We all enjoyed his Facebook postings from business trips around the world.  With him, we toured London, Istanbul, Paris, Berlin, Amsterdam, Madrid, Singapore, and cities all over the U.S.  He adored his hometown of Los Angeles.  In person and in pictures, his smile was ever-present and infectious.

Tributes are pouring in from all over the world.  Tom made friends wherever he went.

A man with a ridiculously unabashed joie de vivre is gone.  His family has suffered a stunning loss.  Tom would never have left them by choice.

They don’t yet know what caused Tom’s untimely death.  We all saw that Tom was always on the go… flying from here to there (often on a red-eye), working into evenings, and having his weekends cut short by business obligations.  Some were envious of his glamorous life.  I know he enjoyed it – but he also wanted to be able to spend more time with his family and friends at home.  Obviously, none of us would choose to slip into the next world in the pale glow of a computer monitor while preparing for a conference call.

It’s been almost exactly four years since Ron and I quit our corporate jobs to live life differently; without conference calls and red eye flights.  Today we are fortunate to share our days with friends and family, enjoying the outdoors, healthy activities, eight hours of sleep a night, and home-cooked meals.  It was a conscious choice that we hope will prolong our lives.  We don’t know how much time we have, but we are going to do our best to make the most of this life.

Jeez, Tom… we already miss you.  As someone wrote on his Facebook page, “Our world is a little dimmer today.”

Seven Years Ago?

Seven years ago, we launched the first chapter of our retirement dream by buying a condo in Chicago.  It was such an exciting step!  I remember our first night here after the closing.  We had two folding chairs, a picnic table and a bottle of champagne.  Sitting in the front room, we talked about how much we would enjoy Chicago and all it has to offer.  We slept on an inflatable mattress on the floor and felt like a couple of kids in their first apartment.

In 2005 we were still working in Memphis.  So for two years we rented the condo to a nice young couple from San Diego.  When they bought their own place and moved on, we decided to start furnishing the condo for our own use - vacations and long weekends.

Then Hilton was sold to The Blackstone Group in 2007 and we planned our early escape for Spring of 2008.  We sold our home in Memphis and, less than two weeks after our last day at work, Chicago became home.  The plan was always to stay here for from three to five years, and then move to somewhere in the Southwest.

Lord, I don't know how seven years passed so fast!  A chapter that was developed from a whim became reality.  And this enchanting chapter is almost over.  We are packing our belongings and readying ourselves for our new life in Prescott, Arizona. 

We have a few more weeks in Chicago, and hope to mix a little fun in with the tasks at hand.  But soon this beautiful city by the lake will become a place to visit instead of home.  We are renting our condo to someone we hope loves living here as much as we have.

I cannot express the satisfaction we have enjoyed from successfully following our hearts.  We dreamed, saved, and planned, and were fortunate to navigate the bumps in the road along the way.  The speed with which the years unwind is breathtaking.  Please take advantage of each and every day. 

Life is good.

The Long Goodbye

It’s time to begin packing up our Chicago home in preparation for our permanent move to Prescott, Arizona. Our little urban oasis has been a fantastic first stop in our retirement; allowing us to enjoy all that this great city has to offer for almost four years. We’ve explored restaurants, shopped local, frequented theaters, established favorites among our neighborhood haunts, and navigated public transportation to get where we want to go. We became accustomed to walking a lot - for fun along the shore of Lake Michigan, with backpacks to pick up groceries, with tickets in hand to Wrigley Field, to the golf course with our clubs, or a few blocks to the neighborhood coffee house or tavern.

Our neighborhood coffee house.

This is where we discovered the joys of post-working life. Lazy mornings in our pajamas could lead to a long, leisurely lunch out, followed by an afternoon nap. It took a while to recover from the years of two demanding careers, but before long we adjusted just fine to being masters of our own lives. Decades of stress finally melted away. We starting sleeping better, eating better, and making time to work out. We not only lost weight, but I swear that we shed a few years.

Our retirement plan always featured Chicago as a temporary home. It’s expensive to live here, and the winters are too harsh. It’s now the beginning of the end of this lovely chapter. (Where did four years go?) By mid-April a moving van will haul our things away, and we will drive to Arizona. Hopefully we will find renters for the condo, beginning May 1st.

It’s difficult to describe the sense of loss this move will cause. We love this city, and the home we created here. Of course we can visit, but it won’t be the same. We’ll miss our friends, our favorite restaurants, summer evenings on the back porch, the cool breezes off the Lake, the excitement of an evening downtown… and so many other things.

As we get the bubble wrap and packing tape out, I’m starting the long goodbye.

"We Are So Spoiled!"



The "Golden Time" of day at Talking Rock.

There are moments when we feel so grateful for where and how we live that all we can say is, “We are so spoiled”.  I hear this same statement fairly often, blurted from my own mouth and uttered spontaneously by friends.  What is it about life here at Talking Rock Ranch in Prescott, Arizona that makes us feel this way?

As I’m having my coffee this morning, I’m watching the sunrise turn the mountains pink.  Late this afternoon, we’ll see the late afternoon light bathe everything in a golden glow.  The deep green of junipers pops against the backdrop of rosy granite rocks and grassy vegetation.  Distant peaks look blue and purple.  Sunsets paint the canvas of the sky with fiery shades of orange and crimson.  We can’t help being entranced by the constantly-changing display of color and form.

Step outside at night and you will see the Milky Way in the midst of a black cloak sparking with billions of stars.  Meteor showers provide special delights.  Daytime skies are often an uninterrupted, intense blue.  The air is clear and fresh, and scented with juniper and sage.  Desert rain coaxes a sweet, flowery scent from the chaparral. 

We happily share this environment with animal friends.  Coyotes yip and howl when they hunt at night.  Cottontails and jackrabbits flash through the brush and hop across the patios behind our homes.   Javelina appear primeval and comical at the same time.  Bobcats are abundant (watch out, bunnies!).  Deer take shortcuts across the golf course.  Dainty hummingbirds buzz happily among the desert flora.

There’s no question that we are spoiled by the beautiful facilities and wonderful staff of Talking Rock Ranch.  I worked in the hotel industry for 30 years, and this club rivals top resorts across the country - and we live here!  Our golf course is pristine, and the club house has one of the best chefs in Prescott.  The Barn fitness center is large and well-equipped, and the locker rooms clean and luxurious.  You can get your coffee fix at Coops, not to mention a stronger beverage, a sandwich, soup, a newspaper, or other everyday items. 

I maintain that it’s the people here that make us feel truly fortunate and spoiled.  The club staff knows us all by name.  Linda knows how you like your coffee.  Ryan keeps tabs on your wine preferences.  Jayce recalls that your favorite cocktail changes with the seasons.  You may get a hug from your server when you arrive for dinner at Morgan’s.  Chef Richard prepares custom meals for special events.  Matt readies your golf cart for a round, and provides valet parking services for the restaurant.  Brian gives great golf tips and lessons.  Members here are spoiled in the best possible ways.   

Lastly, we have wonderful neighbors who are becoming lifetime friends.  We share many interests, much laughter, and even our sorrows.  Doors are opened wide to fun and fellowship.  Together, we share the joy of having found not only a home, but a community.  There is so much to celebrate!

Maybe we’ll change Talking Rock’s tag line.  Instead of “There’s a Certain Spirit Here”, it should be “We Are So Spoiled”.  Both statements express the truth.

Feeling Grateful

I’m back in Chicago after a long and, thankfully, uneventful travel day yesterday. What with all the sitting and waiting, I had plenty of time to let my thoughts wander pleasantly. There is so much for which to be grateful…

We are fortunate to have two beautiful and interesting places to call home, when many are struggling to maintain a single residence. This is a temporary luxury in which I am reveling.

It warms my heart to have a friend and neighbor who allows us to invite ourselves over in the evening to visit (when I already have my pajamas on).

The grace and benevolence of my golfing buddies has not only led me to fall in love with the game, but also provided an environment in which my skills are improving. What fun it is to play with friends!

This city of broad shoulders and bright lights will provide me with one more exciting and sparkling Christmas season. I will enjoy every minute of it. Let it snow!

Our circle of friends has grown and our ties have strengthened over the past year. I hope you know how much you mean to us, and how much joy you add to our lives.

Prescott and Talking Rock Ranch have accepted us for who we are, and will shape who we become. It’s so exciting to explore this new chapter of our lives with such interesting friends and neighbors.

Our planning and decision-making have led us into a life we love. Luck and good fortune have graced us. I am so grateful. Thank you.  Enjoy this holiday season!

The Pleasure of Your Company

One of the most rewarding things about retirement is that I have more time to interact with my friends in a meaningful way. One of the biggest and most welcome surprises is that I am still making friends. All told, the warmth of my friendships bathes me in happiness and comfort.

This week, I have been fortunate enough to enjoy the company of several good friends and long distance encounters with others:

• I spent almost an hour on the phone Sunday with one of my very closest friends and confidantes. We live in different cities now, I miss him, and I treasure our weekly phone calls.
• One of our neighbors has become a close friend. Sunday evening, we chatted with him for about an hour after our condo association meeting, and promised to keep an eye on his place and collect his mail while he is out of town this week. It’s good to have a trusted friend so nearby. (Ron calls him my texting buddy, since that’s often how we keep tabs on each other.)
• Earlier this week, a friend from college sent me an out-of-the-blue message telling me what it means to her that we have reconnected online. It was a heartwarming surprise that made my day.
• Last night we went to dinner and the theatre with friends in Chicago. Over dinner, we caught up on each other’s doings, and then shared a wonderful experience enjoying the play together. We’re already talking about planning a get together during the holidays.
• My new friends in Arizona are a true blessing. I look forward to the day we are full-time residents at Talking Rock Ranch, so we can enjoy that sense of community full-time.

Even surprise acquaintances can offer bright spots to your day. Ron and I golfed with a man two days in a row this week that we met at the starting tee. We discovered that we not only have a friend in common, but also several mutual interests – the symphony, theatre, and golf. Our golf experience was greatly enhanced this week by our conversations with Bob.

Keep expanding your circle of friends. It adds a richness to life at any stage, but may be particularly important to your health and happiness during retirement.

I just downloaded a book to my Kindle - Vital Friends by Tom Rath.  It features results from Gallup studies on friendship, explores how friendships contribute to health and happiness, and even explains how having strong friendships can improve engagement and productivity at work.  I hope it’s an interesting read.

Deciding Where to Settle Down for Retirement

A treasured friend of mine recently sent me an email looking for my opinions about his list of possible retirement locales. He is a successful surgeon who is having trouble imagining his life after retirement. The request he sent, punctuated by, “C’mon Runaway Boomer, don’t let me down!” not only made me laugh, but got me thinking about how to approach the big decision about where to retire in a systematic fashion.

It’s very important to try to visualize how you want life to unfold once you are free from a career that absorbs most of your time and energy. What are the things you would do more of, if you only had time? Many look forward to having the freedom to spend more time socializing with friends and family. Others dream of travel and exploration. For some, it will be a time for more physical action and creativity. You may have thoughts about pursuing a second career, or volunteering in your community. This visualization step requires some pleasant introspection over a period of time.

Picking a geographic location can be complicated. First, consider that you may not need or want to move at all! If you already have a great social situation and the support of friends and family nearby, do you really want to start over in a new place? Or does your soul yearn for the beauty of the mountains or beach and a new beginning? Here are some practical suggestions for going about narrowing down your list of possible locations:

• Start taking short vacations (even 3-4 days) to check out places that you think you might be interested in. Make an appointment with a realtor to take you around, so you can get a feel for housing and neighborhoods available.
• Pick up magazines like "Where to Retire" or “Money”. They do nice profiles of towns and highlight different aspects for consideration, like cost of living, healthcare, taxes, etc.
• You can think about your post-working life in phases. If you decide to buy somewhere, it doesn't have to be forever – it may merely be your next chapter.
• See if you can narrow your options a bit... Mountains, desert, coastal, urban? All have their own beauty, but are all very different.
• Make a list of what you definitely want in a home... Single family or condo, # of bedrooms/baths, view, fireplace, garage, porch or patio, single level or 2-story, etc. This will help you when you work with a realtor, and also help you visualize how you want to live.
• Browse home sales websites for different locales so you can get an idea of what is available and see what places look like.
• Go visit friends in different areas so they can introduce you to what it's like to really live somewhere.
• Look at official websites of cities and town. Email requests for visitor and/or relocation guides. Most places offer them for free.

One more important thought… Be open to surprises changing your plan. My husband and I visited Prescott, Arizona a year and a half ago because it kept popping up on lists of good places to retire. It was love at first sight, and we bought a home in Talking Rock Ranch (SURPRISE: two years earlier than planned), on a golf course (SURPRISE: we had never discussed this before), and making scores of lovely friends (SURPRISE: an amazing bonus to buying into a community). We are having the time of our lives.

Enjoy your decision-making process. It’s a luxury to have the freedom to create your own grand plan.

The End of a Family Era

Coming up the lane to the home place.

Eventually it becomes inevitable that ancestral history and emotional family memories are trumped by the need to face the end of an era. The Bailey/Buchholz Farm is in the process of being sold. A deal closed yesterday on the portion of the land that includes the home place, the “North Farm”. Sale of the remainder, the “South Farm”, will close next month. That land will now be owned by a local farmer who is a family friend.

My husband’s maternal family, the Buchholz’, owned hundreds of acres of farm land in central Illinois' Ford County since settling there in the mid-1800’s. Rons’s grandfather and namesake, Ronald Buchholz, was the last in a long line of family farmers. He retired in 1980. The livestock and chickens had already been sold, and local sharecroppers Ray and Jimmy took over farming the corn and soybeans. Ron’s parents, James Bailey and Barbara Buchholz Bailey retired to the farm in the mid-1980’s. Jim reveled in his retired life as a “gentleman farmer” until his passing in 1995. Barbara succumbed to Alzheimers and spent the rest of her days in a nursing home in Springfield, IL. Ronald lived until he was 95. A cousin sold her acreage to a corporation over ten years ago. The beautiful old farm house has remained, loved but unoccupied, except for occasional family gatherings since 1995.

For many, many years in Melvin, generations of Buchholz’ were not only farmers, but entrepreneurs in the small town, and pillars of the community. The building housing Melvin’s general store and “opera house” even had the Buchholz name carved in stone on the façade. It was demolished about 10 years ago, a depressing harbinger for the town of Melvin as well as for Bailey/Buchholz progeny.



Amandus Buchholz (Ron's Great Great Grandfather) in his general merchandise store.

 

The five Bailey heirs are scattered across the country, living their own lives and building their unique legacies. There is not a farmer among them. The rising value of farm land and commodities, and the deteriorating condition of the farm house, pushed the possibility of a sale to the forefront of consideration. It became clear that it was time to let go. So the sale moves forward.



Ron on the farm in the mid-80's.

Divestiture of the farm is providing an unexpected boost to our retirement. We always included Ron’s share of the farm as an asset in our net worth, but did not count on it being sold during our lifetime. It’s a bittersweet turn of events.

Current generations of family do not share the same dreams as our ancestors; however we believe that they would want us to live our own lives and follow our dreams. I think they would be pleased that they could help.







3 Years into Retirement

I realized the other day that we had passed our 3 year anniversary of retirement from Hilton. It’s amazing how quickly the time has passed, and how much we have done. Time to look briefly look back and share some thoughts.

Immediately after our last day at work, it felt like a huge load had been lifted from our shoulders. It was a very hectic time, with the Memphis house already sold and our preparations to vacate it and move to Chicago (just 2 weeks after our last workday). But we had already achieved a new sense of peace and calm.

As new Chicago residents, we settled into an urban lifestyle in downsized living space – from a 3200 sq ft home to a 1500 sq ft condo (+ a 500 sq ft Man Cave in the basement). Our one remaining car was used infrequently, as we walked everywhere we could, or used public transportation for more distant jaunts. We started losing weight gained over time from stress and being sedentary. Working out is part of our routine, and golf is a new passion.

Of course, just as we began to enjoy our life of leisure, disaster struck the stock market. Our plan was conservative and rock solid, but the recession shook the foundation we had laid. We saw our net worth (temporarily) plummet. Fortunately, we had some cash and some guaranteed income from deferred compensation and an annuity we had purchased at the urging of our financial advisor. We got through the recession OK, and are now back on plan. It was a bit scary for a while.

The other unexpected development was finding our next home in Prescott, Arizona last year. We hadn’t planned to buy until 2012 or 2013, but… Talking Rock Ranch is the perfect community for us, and we love the ranch cottage we found there, and are enjoying new friendships with our neighbors. Due to the real estate disaster in Arizona, we bought our beautiful home from a bank, at a ridiculous discount. We hope to make our full time transition to Arizona next spring. (Anyone in the market for a condo in Chicago?)

We’ve learned a few things as retirement newbies, and had some surprises:

• Our long-tended corporate identities were easily shed. They were unceremoniously left on the floor like discarded snake skins.

• As well as you plan, some bumps in the road will catch you by surprise. Build as much flexibility into your plans as possible.
• After planning for many years, the transition to execution of the plan (living off your savings and investments) is a scary phase and requires a leap of faith.

• Your health is your most precious asset. In order to enjoy retirement, you must be fit and able. It takes a lot of energy to keep up with our retired friends.

Retiring early is the best thing we could ever have done. We enjoy every day, and are looking forward to what the future holds.